Promise
by HoshisamaValmor
Summary: Evil Zeke throws rock at Erwin and Levi is mad. Kindergarten and fluffiness crack AU. The one and only crack thing I'll ever write, completely and totally written because of Hacelee's adorable chibi on tumblr. Spoilers for chapter 81 I guess?
Author's Note: I have no explanation for this, it just happened. I loved this adorableness chibi post made by **hacelee** on tumblr too much I just spent the morning at work thinking and stopped 20 minutes to write it on paper. Me! Writing cracky adorable AU! the world is a strange place.

But I'm not apologizing further because hacelee just brighened my whole day and that's that. The link is: hacelee dot tumblr dot com /post/143962052678/had-to-draw-this  
As if it wasn't surreal enough, I wrote this at work listening to Evil in You by Kalmah :)

Disclaimer: I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin nor chapter 81 nor even the original idea of this fic because that's all due to hacelee's chibi.

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For some blessed minutes, the playroom had been peaceful. The children played without throwing each other to the ground every second, hair pulling and biting or kicking each other.

The caretaker Miss Cargo, named that way half fondly, half annoyingly by the children, let out the perfect sigh of accomplishment and relief at the apparent calm of the playroom that afternoon. Maybe now she would be be able to sit down and close her eyes for five minutes without worrying some revolution might happen.

Levi, one of the most troublesome kids, was for the time being strangefully peaceful, carefully aligning and pilling up dominos. He was a tiny hurracane in form of a child, but right now he might be the most tranquil boy there is, dead focus on his objective. Not far away from him was the contrasting figure of Erwin, happily sitting on the plastic rocking horse. Their two opposite hair colors and expressions stood out, strikingly different on the otherwise identically matching uniforms and matching capes they were wearing today.

Best friends, those two were. In every sense of the expression. That meant fierce mutual protection in times of peril and hardship - which to kids, well, could be any game one of them was losing, for instance. But Levi did tend to take that to some extremes.

Not now. Not today. Everything was well. Miss Cargo could just turn her back a little and go sit down.

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It wasn't his fault, Levi thought after the fact, as he sat pouting and frowning heavily to the wall. He was calm. It wasn't his fault people tried his patience.

Erwin was minding his own business, rocking back and forth on the plastic horse he liked to much. The stupid Zeke was to blame.

He just sneaked close, grinning widely as he aimed and fired. The rock flew past the past horse's head and hit Erwin's rib with a loud and dull 'pop'. More out of scare than actual pain, Erwin fell down the rocking horse with a surprised and hurt cry that might as well have been a roar to the heavens from the immediate reaction it had on Levi.

Zeke, laughing and pointing at his successful trolling now that the younger blond boy was on the floor crying, didn't even notice the instinctive reaction. By the time he saw it, it came to him in the form of a tiny but heavy fist that was shoved at lightning speed from a feral creature that moments before might have just been a frowny kid.

That moment Zeke knew he had misscalculated.

Better yet, that moment he knew he had _fucked up._

"Ow! Stop, that hurts!" The reply to that particular scream was a renewed punch.

"You were enjoying it huh? Well now it's my turn you fucking monkey!"

"Oh! Language!" some other kid censured, though naturally, the rain of punches falling down on Zeke was kind of more important. "Miss Cargo! Miss Cargo! Levi's misbehaving."

The cacophony of screams, Zeke and Erwin's louder, attracked Miss Cargo one second later. Just... one minute. It wasn't even one minute. It hadn't even passed one minute, and the peace was over. Sighing, she turned to see what had could have happened in such little time... only to find how the playroom was now turned into a war zone, the whole scenario made an exact replica with the fallen horse and wounded rider, and a typhoon of punches that produced timed screams of pain and... yes, that was Levi.

"Children! What are you doing?"

"Miss Cargo, help me! Zeke begged, shrieking loudly to attract as much attention as he could.

"Levi! Let go of your friend now."

"Help me! H-" And the next noise got strangely gagged. One of the other children let out a 'blegh' sound.

When Miss Cargo got hold of Levi, he was trying to shove a ruler on Zeke's mouth, the other boy looking pretty much KO'd from the tiny furious kid on top of him.

Levi yelled and complained when Miss Cargo held him up and dropped him back down, landing him on his butt. Zeke was crying and yelling louder, and she was now picking him up but holding him on her lap.

"Levi! What do you think you were doing!"

"He's not my friend. He threw a rock at Erwin!" Levi yelled back. "Look at him! Help _him_!"

"Well, that's not nice of Zeke, of course," she agreed, the moans and complains loud on her ears. "But this is not a battlefield! You overreacted, it's not like Erwin has sustained some kind of life threatning injury, is it?"

Levi turned to Erwin just to make sure.

"Behave yourself. Look at what you were doing!"

"He shoved the ruler on my mouth, did you see Miss Cargo? He was trying to bulge out my eye!" Zeke accused, pointing his finger.

Well that was an idea.

"Levi!" It was like she could read his mind, from the shocked look on her face. "Go sit in the time out corner please."

"But he hurt Erwin! He needs help!"

"See, he's fine," Miss Cargo pointed out, as another caretaker was helping Erwin up, clearly unscathered but with heavy tears still clouding his blue eyes. He was pushing a bit on the theatrics too. "You behave yourself, Levi. This isn't a battlefield!"

Considering how Miss Cargo was just taking Zeke away, it might just as well be.

"Wait, where are you going?"

"I'm taking Zeke away to the infirmary."

"But I'm not done!"

"Levi Ackerman!" Miss Cargo shouted, disapproval in every line of her face as Zeke bellowed louder in order in fear to haste her away. "You're grounded. Go sit in the corner until you're feeling calmer."

"I am calm."

The little fucker shoved out his tongue while Miss Cargo wasn't looking. So Levi growled. And Miss Cargo shot one final ordering stare.

And so he found himself sitting in the colorful plastic stool, facing those ugly letters on the wall and pouting. Alone. Without fault. Little stupid monkey. He was gonna get some.

But for the time being, pouting and frowning it was.

Another full minute later, he heard a rustle from clothes and turned to his side. Erwin was dragging himself and crawling very slowly, as they were under watchful eye of the caretaker to make sure Levi would abide the 5 minute punishment. Erwin thought he'd be invisible if he moved very slowly. Finally, he sat on the floor right next to Levi.

"Thanks for standing up for me."

"Sure thing. Are you hurt?"

"Nah. Just a scratch."

"You sure?"

Erwin nodded.

"Zeke is so mean."

"He won't be for long."

"You're going to get him?"

"Of course."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

"Brofist?"

Erwin raised his closed hand and Levi did the same. Erwin used the balance of their hands to have an excuse to rest against Levi's shoulder, and stayed there for the whole next three minutes of the punishment out of harm's way and within protective reach.

"We're gonna shove Zeke's head on a wall next time."

"Deal."

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~おわり~

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Author's Note: This is the weirdest thing lol. All credits for this go to **hacelee.**

 **thanks for reading.**


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